Wednesday, April 28, 2010

As(s) if things aren't already stressful...

... I ended up in the ER a couple weekends ago. The wee pimple, turned prepubescent boil had matured into an angry abscess. As(s) you might have guessed, the offender resided upon my buttock.

For your reading pleasure, here are the highlights:

1. Oh my god. It went from size of pin head to larger than a golf ball in 5 days! Scary. Really, I should have gone in when it was quarter sized and painful 24/7... but(t) I thought maybe it would resolve on its own.

2. One blood culture came back positive for bacterial growth. Back to the ER for another round of IV antibiotics. The bruising from all the blood draws and IVs is now gone and I am no longer worried about being mistaken for an IV drug using rogue scientist.

3. Totally hot butch nurse. Enough said. (My family reads this blog, people)

4. Done with antibiotics, and only need to get the wound repacked every other day now...definitely on the road to recovery.

5. I have SERIOUSLY modified my butt pimple SOP (standard operating procedure). At least until the pain is distant memory, then I will likely be back to my previous shenanigans.

6. And speaking of shenanigans, Violet put a smile on my face by sharing this with me. As(s) you can see, very apropos.

7. Sara lobbied to take pictures but(t) I wouldn't let her. Gross, right? This from the woman who nearly passed out when she got a good look at it. Sheesh.

And for those interested, the work update: I didn't get THE job, but I have a good line on A job that will gain me some valuable experience too. And I am filled with confidence having made it down to the final two applicants...I believe this whole job-thing is totally do-able. Whew.


weese said...

excellent advice should i ever have the need.
did you ask for pain killers.
you should always ask for pain killers.

Syd said...

Weese is right. Rookie mistake if you didn't ask for pain meds.

Thank you for NOT post pics.

Hope your ass is better now.

e said...

OUCH! You poor thing! Glad it was resolved... How was it baring your boil ridden butt for the hot butch nurse?

Final two applicants is good in this economy. You'll get the next one.

Anonymous said...

Poor you! At least you're on the road to recovery now.

#3 makes me wish your family didn't read your blog. :) I would love to read all about this hot butch nurse.

#6 still has me laughing.

Grumpy Granny said...

Oh, my goodness, sounds like you have had a rather ass-stounding time! LOL. But(t), I have found that using humor is one of the best ways to deal with things like this. Glad you are on the road to recovery and that A job is in your sights.

Hee hee,


roro said...

OMG - brutal. My roommate had an ass abcess two years in a row - they brought in medical students to look at it. She had to have surgery on hers and then this angry home care nurse came by every day for two weeks to pack it full of gauze. So I'm glad your ass-venture was resolved - and I too thank you for not posting photos.

Yay for job fun! Fingers crossed that you get it! How could you not, are delightful.